Kiss my apse

Osculate. v. os·cu·lat·ed, os·cu·lat·ing, os·cu·lates
1 . To kiss.

Tom Watson kissingWhile all truly holy priests osculate at the altar of our Lord, the lips of many often touch more profane objects. This week golfer Tom Watson was seen osculating the Swilcan Bridge approaching the 18th hole as he bid farewell to the Old Course at St. Andrew’s during his final round at the British Open.

Kissing the Blarney StoneOthers like to make the pilgrimage to the castle of Blarney in the small city of Cork, Ireland, to osculate its famous Blarney Stone. More than 300,000 make the annual trek up to the castle in the hopes of gaining more eloquent speech. I could only hope that many of my fellow clerics would endeavor to make this trip themselves, as anyone who is subjected to their preaching might attest. It’s a difficult physical feat to kiss the Blarney Stone and more than one pilgrim has plunged to his death in the process. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Pope kissing groundSometimes people like to osculate terra firma when they return from a harrowing journey, outer space, or New Jersey. I like to kiss the floor of the sacristy after I make it through a wedding rehearsal with a particularly annoying and pushy mother-of-the-bride. If you kiss the floor , any floor, under the influence, that does not count.

ApseWelcome to my new blog. You’ll find I have strong opinions on a variety of things liturgical and clerical. Sometimes I’ll “Acknowledge” and sometimes I’ll “Bewail.” But mostly bewail. I care passionately about Jesus and anything that does less than honor him is reason to bewail. So beware. And if you don’t like what I have to say? You can Kiss My Apse. Which is just another form of osculation.

Yours in the Lord,

Oscar Late +

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